Doctor, doctor...gimmie the news.

 This photo is the most misleading one on the internet.

Two weeks in the hospital does not feel nor look anything close to it.

So, bad things come in threes, they say?

What I thought was a simple ankle sprain ended up being the discovery of former ankle fractures and a chunk of my tibia (shinbone) being, well, not with the rest of my tibia anymore. That was on Valentine's Day. The following Friday, I'm back at the doctor with a really nasty case of strep throat complete with a off-my-ass delusional fever and the next day I got the "it's going around" stomach flu on top of all this.

The rest of Febuary included being admitted into the hospital twice and once again in March. Within 2 days of my final release from the hospital, my 8 year old son has a seizure and is admitted to the same hospital's ICU. Oh, yeah, by the way, seizure day was also our daughter's 7th birthday.

That threes thing? Bullshit.

It all sucked royally. However, I'm sitting to type this in some workout shorts I ordered mid-Febuary that were snug when they arrived. I've got to roll them up and use the drawstring now because these past weeks of Hell have given me a 12 pound weight loss and put me at my lowest weight since my husband and I married in 2009. My mid-term goal is to reach the weight I was at when we first met and it's now only 22 pounds away.

As I've mentioned before, I'm an emotional eater. I have taken in more Mountain Dew in the past month than I have in the 3 months before. I have not worked out but have noticed that even while sick/stressed - I am more physically active than I have been in years naturally now. I unconciously limit myself when it comes to "the Dew" and practice portion control that amazes me without a single thought.

I'm glad I changed my lifestyle BEFORE the shit hit the fan and well before enough to get myself into healthy eating habits and activity so that I didn't add on weight during stressful periods. I blame the days I couldn't eat and all the nausea for the weight loss recently - I would have been happy just not gaining during I time when I would have eaten myself into some semblance of sanity.

Get healthy TODAY. We can't control what happens around us but we can control what shape our bodies are in when it happens and how we allow it to effect us.

Personal Goals Update

Well, it's been awhile - updating a blog daily, even weekly is more difficult that I thought & I have much more respect for those who can.

Since December 27th , I have almost 30 pounds and lost about 5 inches. My last weigh in at my doctor's office reported 25 pounds and that was confirmed at my visit yesterday and I was a few pounds heavier on my home scale a few weeks before the highest weight visit. So, feeling good. I have a great doctor who is super supportive and was very happy to hear that I am doing this. With all of these options before me - gastric banding (lap band), weight loss clinics, diet pills, etc...I am proud to have chosen the good 'ol fashioned diet and exercise. It has really helped me in emotional, spiritual and financial ways - not just physical! I'm hitting the fresh foods/ homemade meals more and in smaller portions, avoiding fast food as much as possible and that has helped my wallet immensley. Finding at-home workout equipment via online "yard sale" groups has also provided me with a getting-awesomer home gym that will replace my monthly gym membership dues at the end of this month. I am also running a faster mile that I have since I was a teenager. It's been a productive month!

The emotional and spiritual aspects of exericise and truly caring about what is going inside your body are incredible. I feel much more "at peace" with myself and I am happier. I've struggled with depression for many years and I feel this past month it has really taken a backseat to better emotional states. I am so excited about my progress, exercise and nutrition that I can hardly contain it sometimes! I never thought I would be one of those people.

Until next time...

Today's Inspiration

Bring your fat to tears today. Get that heart pumping. You've got this!

Do the crappy days count?

I don't know all of the reasons that lead up to me being Captain Fatass of the SS Lardy, but one of them I am sure of is emotional eating. If I'm happy, I want to celebrate with a huge, decadent meal and when I'm sad I want to drown my sorrows in a pint of Ben and Jerry's with half a can of RediWhip on top. You think I'm joking?

The past few months have been an emotional roller coaster for me and just because my mind says "Diet! Exercise! Health!" my heart says "Sad. Angry. Hurt. Depressed.Overwhelmed" - and I have to ask myself, does today count? Should I just throw my face into the nearest container of anything deep fried or covered in chocolate for comfort? Oooh, a bottle of something that has a proof and you have to be 21 to buy. Yeah, baby.

No, baby.

My first step into taking control over my body was to realize there aren't any days off. No days don't count. Every bite,sip, step, crunch and squat matter.Your body works for you. Don't let the employee become the boss.

My key to success over emotional eating was to not limit myself and make things out of bounds. If I am feeling low and think some chocolate would help, I know denying myself will make me want it even more. I've found those 100-Calorie packs of sweet stuff have been my savior in stressful times but they wouldn't have been if I'd been left alone with them. Have someone keep you accountable. Enjoy the treat and let it go. If you live alone or don't have a support or workout/fitness buddy, keep them in the car or even at a parent or friend's house. Make yourself work for the treat! Small candy bars or a small sundae work too. Yes, they are calories and yes, you need to work them off. Don't buy anything King Sized or Large. Seriously, people, why do we do that shit anyways? We ain't royalty or giants but we've made ourselves royally giant by doing so.

If you're going to have a drink, I've found that either Wine or Hard Liquors are the easiest on the diet and the most effective to get that buzz going enough without killing your entire day. SparkPeople.com has an excellent guide to diet-friendly alcohol consumption that I refer to here.

And before you take that stress relieving bite or drink -- try a workout. Even 10 minutes of yoga or intense cardio lift my spirits. Go run up and down your stairs or yard. Make sure you're in control so that your treat is yours - not the other way around.

My mantra today has been "Nothing tastes as good as thin feels." - ain't that the truth.

I'm the token funny fat girl...

and I always have been.

I've been overweight my entire life, even as an athlete in my younger years. After having two children, I have hit the highest weights and the lowest emotional lows I ever thought possible.

On January 1st, 2012, my new life resolution (I don't do New Year's resolutions...!) was to be healthy for my kids, for my husband, for myself and for those sweet-ass high school jeans that sit on the top shelf of my closet...and finally, to toss said jeans out in the Goodwill bag when they're too big for me. To go into any store and be able to buy what I want to wear. To wake up and feel awesome. To love working out. To actually crave food that fuels my body. I could go on and on...

Today is January 26th and I've always heard if you do something for 21 days, it becomes a habit or an addiction. Well, I'm addicted to exercise! I have always been a slack-ass, doing just what I had to get by in my high school years. Now I find myself pushing harder every day. The exhilaration and the high I've gotten from exercise is like nothing I've ever felt because I'd never even tried to push myself before. I have learned so much about nutrition and what my body needs and I'm only at the tip of the iceberg.

I wanted to start this blog because my weight is, while something that is first noticed about me, has always been something private to me. I've found that status updates and tweeting about my progress have kept me going and if blogging will help, I'm all for it. I've also been overwhelmed with messages and comments by those who are encouraged by my journey - if I can help one person get into those high school jeans again, it will be just as exciting as if it were my own experience!

I'll be posting things that help me. I'm not a nutritionist, trainer or a doctor and I have been winging my own routines and eating habits by myself with the support of my wonderful doctor and supportive husband and kids. I hope they help you, too!

Truly yours,
The (former-to-be) Funny Fat Girl